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12.21.2005 sigh- glad to be back in singapore. 7 days without internet access (and nothing to do) is torturous. 14.12.05 creative writing (on the highway to putrajaya) every now and then we war to decide who's the bigger pissoff- crafting words so intricate, we weave lies into spiderwebs trapping wandering emotions in the tapestries. but poets can only be so distant transcribing resplendent fantasies and catastrophic heartbreaks into mundane theses. only when the greatest are their weakest do they pen marvellous stanzas. if at the end we discover salmonella robbed snow white from her pitiful happily ever after do we dare fall in love again sunken in a distorted fairytale. and he can only await the colours of mardi gras- consume the pain in that moment of alocholic ecstasy. (near midnight) as i vomit these words on the edge of a water basin ghosts shroud me with every scratch. naivete dreams out of narnia lay scattered by a strange bedside, leprechauns dancing by midnight and the rainbow slammed shut- beautiful, but oh, a pot of lies. i wish you love / i wish you could love as he treaded on my weakest heel i flared. 16.12.05 suria klcc  when shopping in a country not as affluent as your own, try not to meet the eyes of shop attendants. too much self-pity and envy in those misty black pearls can rob you off your passion to contribute to the nation's wealth. 17.12.05 alamanda and tv as more and more i read into italo svevo's as a man grows older, more and more i feel i resemble the protagonist Emilio Brentani in my recent 'adventure' - to be cheated upon by beauty and charm, and frustrated by a friend who reveals too little and yet too much.  this cost me RM10.99, which is only S$4.99! :)  poshest a&w i've ever seen a person to remember: Ervina of MFM (Alamanda Putrajaya) on peace: if we say 'we need peace, we must have peace now', we're not going to get it. conversely, if we reason that 'there is still time, people may be doing cruel things to each other now, but we can still wait' we might get peace immediately... the most important thing is not to seem to eager, not to BE to eager - mr economics laureate two double-o five apparently, this has something to do with game theory. quote from Ghosts of Mississipi when you hate, the only person who suffers is you; because most of the people you hate don't know it, (and) the rest don't care. 18.12.05 reading i never go to the cemetery now... the dead are dead, and comfort can only come from the living. we may wish it otherwise, but so it is. it is the living who have need of us. - Italo Svevo in the voice of Signorina Elena, As a Man Grows Older 20.12.05 last day (finally)  the cathedral-like mosque (it's not as small as it looks) random fact: did you know government officials and their family get free lodging (ie. apartments) in putrajaya while (most of) the rest of the nation tries to manage in slum-like conditions? 16:57 / and blackened tears fell with mine // |
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